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REASONS TO STUDY NLP - 3B IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

12/4/2022

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There’s so many ways NLP can help our personal relationships – so I’ve split this topic into 2 sections. Read my previous post for an intro into how NLP can help important relationships.

Many of our participants come wanting to improve the communication with someone they love. Some of the NLP techniques are specifically designed around managing relationships.

Key to improving your relationships is the knowledge that you actually can’t change anyone else (as much as you may REALLY want to) - you can only change the way you react to the situation and the way you show up in the relationship. Every relationship is built on rapport, and this is often at its strongest in family relationships – its how we can have a blazing argument and still be friends again by bedtime. When a relationship feels challenging, it’s the first thing to build back up. Understanding HOW rapport works, and how you can strength this further will improve every important relationship.

Disagreements and arguments are common in relationships, but it doesn’t always need to turn into a row. A simple phrase such as ‘what would you like me to do differently’ rather than a defence, or an argument, or flat out denial, can save hours of arguments, and may even save a relationship. We explore this and other phrases - we look at how you can give feedback or input into a conversation that encourages the other person to listen, and also how you can ask for feedback (and listen to it) instead of jumping to defence.

Although our family are often where we can be most open with our emotions, sometimes being able to manage your emotional state, for example, when dealing with a tantrummy toddler, or challenging teenager, or even the cliché difficult mother-in-law; can allow you to appear calm, confident and in control. This allows you to continue to be a ‘safe’ place for your children to open up to and to keep a clear head to maintain your own boundaries and priorities. State management is a huge part of NLP.

So often we think that everyone else understands things, processes information and thinks the same way as us – we don’t even consider that there may be a different way of doing it as we assume everyone is wired the same. In fact, there are many different ways of taking in information and processing it in your brain – you may have a visual preference, auditory preference, kinaesthetic preference, or even an auditory digital preference. Have you ever wondered why your partner can’t remember what you told them verbally yesterday but can bring up the exact contents of a Whatsapp argument from 4 years ago? This would indicate your partner has a much strong preference for visually written information than for auditory information. The realisation that my partner was experiencing and remembering events in an entirely different way to me was a game changer in our relationship!
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If you are interested to find out more about how the NLP Diploma could help your important relationships, or to book your place now, contact me at cat@reachthepeak.co.uk or on 07757 542956. 
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    Cat Trebilco - lessons from things I learnt along the way on this journey called life!

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